Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
