Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
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