how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
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