Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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