school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
