Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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