Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
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