You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
