garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
