I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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