Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
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