It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
