I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Randomize
