Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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