I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize