guys are only as good as the porn they watch
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
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