The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
