problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
