Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Randomize
