Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Randomize