Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
