I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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