she was so not down for the gang bang
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
