Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize