Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize
