Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
