talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
