You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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