Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
