Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
