I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize