To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
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