Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize