i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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