do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
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i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
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