i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
mondays should just be called national damage control day
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize