I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Randomize
