Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
