Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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