My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize