Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Randomize
