oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
