Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
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