p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
