i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Randomize
