I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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