To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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