just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
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