I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Randomize
