ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
