Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
